Friday, April 07, 2006

Which way?

One day Alice came to a fork in the road and saw a Cheshire cat in a tree. "Which road do I take?" she asked. "Where do you want to go?" was his response. "I don't know," Alice answered. "Then," said the cat, "it doesn't matter."
~ Lewis Carroll

My father has a way of getting through to me that no one else does. On our way to the airport, going back to DC after Winter Break, he started one of his usual talks. They're normally the kind of conversations where he asks a lot of questions, and I give a lot of vague answers, and "I don't know"s. That might sound a bit familiar to the people who know me well enough. Somewhere along the way, he asked me if I remembered the above passage from Alice in Wonderland. I said no, wondering how come I'd never read that book, though I know the story. After he told it to me I was kind of silent for a while. "Do you get it?" was the next question. I said yes. I did get it, and it got to me. That was one damned smart cat. Then he said something else that got to me even more: that the opposite is also true. Leave it up to Daddy to fry my brain at 4am on the Churchill-Roosevelt Highway. I love my daddy.

It was like our own little indian version of The Wonder Years. Heh. Seriously though, I remembered this conversation of ours recently while having another interesting conversation about life with a friend of mine, and somehow it hasn't faded away since. I also started reading Alice in Wonderland.

In my case, the prevailing tines in my fork tend to be right and wrong. My conclusion is that if I don't know which way I want to go, then it doesn't matter how I live. Additionally, if I'm not living rightly...then it doesn't really matter which way I want to go. Brings a whole new meaning to the road to hell being paved with good intentions, doesn't it? Not that I believe in hell. But that's not the point.

What's the moral of my story? Go read Alice in Wonderland.

What they don't tell you when you're a kid is that you are Alice...and Wonderland is your life.

7 comments:

aka_lol said...

Do you wonder where you are going to land Alice?

No sir, not really, I just thought I would take a road and see where it ends up.

And if you don' like it?

I will come back.

Now, now Alice, foolish child, some roads we take may not allow us to go the other way, like Henry St. and Frederick St. for instance.

So what should I do sir?

Buy a map Alice, talk to those who are where they are. You don't have to go there to understand. Use your cell phone. The prices are very competitive since Digicel is here.

But sir, isn't life about experience and building on the experience?

Yes it is Alice but we must be aware that some experiences can set us on a path of no return, like the bmobile contract.

You really are on the take for Digicel sir.

No Alice, I am on the take for competition in the cellular market.

Oh ho.

Alice, I am sure you know that all that glitters is not gold and all that looks good won't make us happy.

Yes sir, but some of my friends tell me that I am young and if it feels good do it.

I can hardly believe you would fall for that. Being young means you have the most potential and that is even more reasons you should be extremely cautious. You look at TV and go to the movies, can you not tell the difference between fantasy and reality? Do the right thing, now that was a good movie.

I didn't see it that way sir but I want to have fun.

Pleasure is different to happiness. Happiness is long term but pleasure, now that feels good! Ah-hem, never mind my ranting, choose a road which will make you happy. You know Alice, we all want the same things in the long run.

And what is that thing sir?

Don't get me started Alice. Seriously though, I think we must assume we would be here for the long haul and that should influence our road-choice. Helping people is the best way of helping yourself. Be part of the solution and not the problem.

And if I choose the wrong career of wrong spouse?

Alice, that is why I say we have to know what moves us and what drives us to want a tomorrow. Look inside and think outside the box (sorry hs).

All this sounds very hard sir. I think I will just go to Digicel and take it from there.

Now that's a good start.

HS said...

Don't apologize aka_lol, I realise that I may not have explained myself well enough to those who doesn't know me.

The struggle is not between the traditional right and wrong, but between right and "right".

I'd explain further, but I'd end up sounding like a crazy person...or worse.

aka_lol said...

I assume you are leaning towards the "right," or at least seriously thinking about it. Most of the time the difference between right and wrong, or right and "right" is never absolute and that's why the choice is painful.

I'd explain further, but I'd end up sounding like a crazy person...or worse.

If you read my blog you would think I am even worse than a crazy person but ...ok bad example, but I seriously doubt I would ever think you are anything close to crazy. I guess you are committed to say why now :)

firebird said...

We are all Alice, even though we are all Men ...

I really like that you equated the story of Alice in Wonderland to a very human need that existss in all of us. I though that was brilliant.

Also even though there is "right" & "right" and we must choose, the best way is to look at the result of each right, and in doing so, if it does not cause too much harm choose the right that will result in the benefit of others as well as yourself.

That is in agreement with aka that sometimes the best way to help oneself is to help others.

It really works.

I hope you make the right decision and more so that you learn from the outcome no matter what it is!!!

HS said...

aka_lol, you wouldn't think me crazy (or worse), but what about everyone else? :)

thanks firebird, but Lewis Carroll is the brilliant one, not I. :)

I wish I were creative...and tactful enough to explain the subject of this blog properly. Thanks for all the advice, but I fear that I've made you guys shoot blindly. Still good advice though. Thanks :)

Anonymous said...

I think right is right and left is also right... everything in the end is "right".

I doh feel like explaining, I hope u understand wat im sayin.
K, lets go to starbucks :)

aka_lol said...

The longer we stay away from something the harder it would be to do. With that in mind, I made a short list of things we should never stay away from unless we are preoccupied doing something else. I also made another list but that was for groceries. Unfortunately, both list and what was written on them would not be published for reasons I am yet to come up with. Remember, life is short, but Shakira is shorter :)